(Seriously, y'all just had to know this was coming...)
When Black Friday comes
I'll camp out by the door
And be first in line when they
Open the mega-store.
When Black Friday comes
It won't matter if it's snowed,
I'll be banging bumpers out
On skating-rink roads.
When Black Friday falls, the prices they will be
The next best thing to free.
When Black Friday comes
I can't stop to think or look
Gonna scribble numbers and words
In my skinny checkbook.
Gotta keep all those Chinese
Making gadgets, toys, and shoes
With their billion mouths to feed--
And nothing to lose.
When Black Friday comes, we'll forget the bill:
You know I will.
When Black Friday comes
Gonna auction off my soul,
And eBay will help me fill
In this credit sink-hole.
Gonna snatch up all I can buy me,
Deferred payments gonna justify me,
If I default, it's their loss:
I'm gonna let it roll!
When Black Friday comes
I'm gonna know no shame:
It's how we play this game.
