Friday, June 24, 2011

Frivolous Friday, 06.24.2011: Geek bar jokes

An J2EE JDBC connection walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be?" "Nothing right now, thanks," replies the connection as it makes a bee-line for the billiard tables, "I'm just here for the pool."

Richard Stallman walks into a bar. Recognizing him, the barkeep asks, "Hey, Richard! What's GNU?"

A memory slot walks into a bar. Peering down at its diminutive size, the bartender snorts, "You must be a cheap drunk." "Yeah," concedes the memory slot, "I can really only hold one DRAM."

An ICMP ping walks into a bar, twiddles its thumbs at a table for a second, then demands, "How long does it take to get a server around here?"

An HTML <TBODY> tag, <TBODY> tag, and <TFOOT> tag walk into a bar and order a round. When it's about time for seconds, the bartender notices that he can only see the <THEAD> and <TBODY> at their booth. "Where'd your friend go?" asks the bartender. "You mean <TFOOT> ?" reply the <THEAD> and <TBODY> tags, "He's always under the table!"

A web browser walks into a bar where a web server is tickling the ivories at the house piano. The browser sticks a few bills into the web server's jar and asks, "You take requests?"

A *nix print job walks into a bar. After a few rounds, the bartender notices how pie-eyed the job has become and sighs, "In its CUPS again..."

The Java Math class walks into a bar and announces, "Hey, everybody--the next .round() is on me!"

Steve Wozniak walks into the Genius Bar...

A SATA drive and an IDE drive walk into a bar. After nervously glancing around, the IDE disk drive whispers to the SATA, "Are you sure we want to be here? This place looks awfully SCSI to me."